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Going Nowhere [PDF / EPUB] Going Nowhere My name is Hibiscus Brown, my best friend is a unicorn and my life is going absolutely nowhereOh, and I m a witch At least partly the rest is all werewolfAfter growling a little to loudly, Hibiscus Ki My name is Hibiscus Brown, my best friend is a unicorn and my life is going absolutely nowhereOh, and I m a witch At least partly the rest is all werewolfAfter growling a little to loudly, Hibiscus Kitty Brown finds herself in the unfortunate situation of having to move back home to live with her dad the werewolf , her step mom the werebear , and all the other creatures living in a small town called NowhereSurely it s just temporary Surely even a half witch half werewolf can figure out what she wants to do with her life Surely the handsome werewolf who just moved back will ignore her, like he mostly did when they were in high school And surely the mysterious dark stranger who seems to pop up just about everywhere will help her when she needs it And what about the missing amulet Will Grandma Hazel find it And what does Grandpa Hunter wear on his head So many questions let s see if we can bring some clarity to it all, shall we NOTE There will be f bombs And references to s e x Nothing graphic because it s not my style, but there certainly will be shit that isn t super appropriate for a younger audience You have been warned This book is a slightly edited version of a story I wrote on Wattpad.


10 thoughts on “Going Nowhere

  1. says:

    Unless you are looking for a totally irreverent read, filled with quirky, crazy characters, most of them from the same dysfunctional, supernatural family, three generations worth turn back now, because this laugh out loud tale is not for the faint of heart Meet Hibiscus Brown, a half witch, half werewolf down on her luck and moving back in with her father and step mother AND her rather far out there grandparents, all citizens of the tiny town, Nowhere Lena North s GOING NOWHERE is a raucous r Unless you are looking for a totally irreverent read, filled with quirky, crazy characters, most of them from the same dysfunctional, supernatural family, three generations worth turn back now, because this laugh out loud tale is not for the faint of heart Meet Hibiscus Brown, a half witch, half werewolf down on her luck and moving back in with her father and step mother AND her rather far out there grandparents, all citizens of the tiny town, Nowhere Lena North s GOING NOWHERE is a raucous romp into the misadventures of one young woman who is a magnet for trouble, or complications I swear, from page one, I started chuckling, just couldn t help it and by the end, I was laughing out loud, and did I mention it was around 3 am Pretty sure Lena North has nailed paranormal comedy perfectly, so if you re looking for something just for fun, here s your read Silly, snarky and often a little raw, meet the family that you may be glad doesn t live next door, but certainly makes life anything but dull I received a complimentary copy from Lena North Publisher FAB Books 1 edition October 13, 2018 Publication Date October 13, 2018Genre Paranormal Comedy Amateur SleuthsPrint Length 195 pagesAvailable fromBarnes NobleFor Reviews, Giveaways, Fabulous Book News, follow


  2. says:

    This is a story I wrote on Wattpad, and I had so much fun with Kitty and her crazy family that I decided to share it also in ebook format Go grab it it s free everywhere This is a story I wrote on Wattpad, and I had so much fun with Kitty and her crazy family that I decided to share it also in ebook format Go grab it it s free everywhere


  3. says:

    What FUN Sheer ridiculous entertaining, HILARIOUS fun Just what I needed on this particular day My fellow travellers on the bus, however thought I was batty LOL AND it seems to be permanently free on kindle go grab it if you re up for a laugh


  4. says:

    FREE ontoday 3 4 2019 Blurb My name is Hibiscus Brown, my best friend is a unicorn and my life is going absolutely nowhere.Oh, and I m a witch At least partly the rest is all werewolf.After growling a little to loudly, Hibiscus Kitty Brown finds herself in the unfortunate situation of having to move back home to live with her dad the werewolf , her step mom the werebear , and all the other creatures living in a small town called Nowhere.Surely it s just temporary Surely e FREE ontoday 3 4 2019 Blurb My name is Hibiscus Brown, my best friend is a unicorn and my life is going absolutely nowhere.Oh, and I m a witch At least partly the rest is all werewolf.After growling a little to loudly, Hibiscus Kitty Brown finds herself in the unfortunate situation of having to move back home to live with her dad the werewolf , her step mom the werebear , and all the other creatures living in a small town called Nowhere.Surely it s just temporary Surely even a half witch half werewolf can figure out what she wants to do with her life Surely the handsome werewolf who just moved back will ignore her, like he mostly did when they were in high school And surely the mysterious dark stranger who seems to pop up just about everywhere will help her when she needs it And what about the missing amulet Will Grandma Hazel find it And what does Grandpa Hunter wear on his head So many questions let s see if we can bring some clarity to it all, shall we


  5. says:

    Everything about this book should have put it squarely into the realm of books I rate highly With the possible troubling element that it was a heterosexual book, but most of the books I read that are contemporary romances with fantasy elements with injections of humor tend to be heterosexual books So not really an issue ButI believe I might have smiled once, and let out something resembling a laugh maybe once But otherwise, no.It is difficult to read a book that features as the sole p Everything about this book should have put it squarely into the realm of books I rate highly With the possible troubling element that it was a heterosexual book, but most of the books I read that are contemporary romances with fantasy elements with injections of humor tend to be heterosexual books So not really an issue ButI believe I might have smiled once, and let out something resembling a laugh maybe once But otherwise, no.It is difficult to read a book that features as the sole point of view someone depicted as being, while not literally or openly stated, but shown as being dumber than a door knob Especially when everyone around this main character keeps taking advantage of her, constantly laughs at her even if she regularly doesn t always know why they are laughing , and, this one being a deal breaker, men keep ignoring her when she says no She says no to dating two different men They come to an agreement among themselves that both will date her she still says she doesn t want to date them They continue to ignore her Then they steal kisses Then, and this was the deal breaker, while she is saying no, and literally trying to get away but finds that the man is just too strong, and while she is still saying no, he forces her onto his lap and proceeds to kiss her Howhumorously romantic I liked that the main character kicked Jackson, the one who did the thing described above, in the balls twice, hard But she did that before all the other stuff happened She did that when she first saw him not as a hello type gesture, but because she had been supposed to be his prom date but he ditched her.You know how they tell stand up comics not to laugh at their own jokes who is they, and no this isn t a 100% always rule Well, if you are writing humor, don t have every bloody character laughing non stop throughout the whole bloody book Kitty, the so far unnamed main character, has best friends that constantly laugh at her They learn she got fired from her latest job They laugh Everything was super humorous to Elsa the unicorn and Joel the gearhead or whatever term was used, he s some type of fantasy creature who has control over electronics Kitty arrives home because she has to move back in Whole family laughs at her The man who ditched Kitty turns up, they laugh at her She kicks that man hard in the balls, twice, they laugh at her, they learn that he blackmailed her into going on a date they both laugh at her and force her to go on the date, despite her strenuous objections For being a big manly werewolf sheriff dude, pops sure giggled a lot and forced his daughter to date creepy men Thanks, pops, eh She asks people in a bar if anyone wants a beer, everyone laughs A man enters the bar and the bar patrons notices his interest in Kitty, everyone laughs Bah An Angel tells Kitty to do something, she refuses, Rafe laughs because, apparently, Angels have the power to make people do stuff except, apparently, Kitty which was later used as a joke when they visited a bordello and the one woman there who didn t obey orders says something like I m a lesbian to which Kitty immediately responded with something like I m not a lesbian ha ha That built in controlling voice thing That s not creepy, at all Heh, mmphs.The rape y vibe, and inability of the men to take no was the deal breaker, though You know, those moments when Kitty would say no, people would ignore her, and physically molest her Yeah, those moments I m not sure if it isproblematic that she was shown to like it after the fact, or just the part where her no wasn t accepted Oh, and lastly, a werewolf named Kitty Well, half werewolf Has been done before Carrie Vaughn s Kitty Norville series, though this Kitty is a full werewolf November 4 2019


  6. says:

    Going Nowhere is a fun filled frolic with angels, shifters, witches, and glitter farting unicorns If you are after a heavy, angst laden book, then I m sorry, but you ve found the wrong one This is an action packed book that has romantic elements to it, but it doesn t overrule the whole story There are plenty of laugh out loud moments, in fact, far too many to count I loved this book from start to finish With its crazy family, and heart warming characters, plus there is always which one Hibis Going Nowhere is a fun filled frolic with angels, shifters, witches, and glitter farting unicorns If you are after a heavy, angst laden book, then I m sorry, but you ve found the wrong one This is an action packed book that has romantic elements to it, but it doesn t overrule the whole story There are plenty of laugh out loud moments, in fact, far too many to count I loved this book from start to finish With its crazy family, and heart warming characters, plus there is always which one Hibiscus will go for A brilliant story that I hope will be the start of a new series Excellently written, with no editing or grammatical errors to disrupt my reading flow I thoroughly enjoyed every word, and really can t recommend this lighthearted novel highly enough Verified Purchase October 2018 MerissaArchaeolibrarian I Dig Good Books


  7. says:

    So much potential Agree that it is light and frothy Perfectly readable Problem is that the author has thrown in every element possible to make this a light frothy read and it suffers because of it The zany family Please rein them in Quickly grew tired of the heroine s ability to both come out triumph but be the butt of jokes because she slipped fell got snotted on etc etc been done a thousand times And how come Kitty has to be the one who slips looks like an idiot the two guys are So much potential Agree that it is light and frothy Perfectly readable Problem is that the author has thrown in every element possible to make this a light frothy read and it suffers because of it The zany family Please rein them in Quickly grew tired of the heroine s ability to both come out triumph but be the butt of jokes because she slipped fell got snotted on etc etc been done a thousand times And how come Kitty has to be the one who slips looks like an idiot the two guys are too uber smooth And why they are both after Kitty is never fully explored Nor is why she won t date even though she is forced into dates The magic rules changed One minute she s not really a practising witch, next she s performing spells, make up your mind Lots of elements were great here but often remained unexplored Then there was like a hundred other elements thrown in, just to kind of see if they would stick.Liked it but grew frustrated with it


  8. says:

    Laughed so hard I snorted I was so surprised by Going Nowhere Kitty and her family are a hoot, her best friends are a widget and a unicorn who farts glitter to calm down a situation The trouble her horny Grandpa Hunter got up to was hilarious, and her a Grandma Hazels new job as a pole dancer had me in stitches Oh, and did I mention that this witchy wolf is being courted by an Angel and a werewolf Anyway, the mystery of the Missing Amulet was fun, and led to numerous other side quests, se Laughed so hard I snorted I was so surprised by Going Nowhere Kitty and her family are a hoot, her best friends are a widget and a unicorn who farts glitter to calm down a situation The trouble her horny Grandpa Hunter got up to was hilarious, and her a Grandma Hazels new job as a pole dancer had me in stitches Oh, and did I mention that this witchy wolf is being courted by an Angel and a werewolf Anyway, the mystery of the Missing Amulet was fun, and led to numerous other side quests, searching for lost stuff She may not be much of a witch, or able to change into a wolf, but Kitty has freaky good luck, and a lot of pluck to rush in where Angels fear to tread Can t wait to see what Kitty and Co get up to next.4.5 stars


  9. says:

    Perfect read for a rainy Saturday Laughed so hard I snorted, Kitty is a bit clueless but she s surrounded by amazing people, amazing eccentric people, which makes for some hilarious situations Hope there is a sequel.


  10. says:

    The best description for this one is paranormal Stephanie Plum There are alot of similarities but interestingly I didn t really notice them til about half way in because I was so involved and entertained by the story Then one of the 2 guys called her babe in a way that reminded me of Ranger and I started toting up the matching points there are crazy grandparents, two hot guys both interested in Kitty and their names even start with a J and R respectively Jackson the hot werewolf cop who d The best description for this one is paranormal Stephanie Plum There are alot of similarities but interestingly I didn t really notice them til about half way in because I was so involved and entertained by the story Then one of the 2 guys called her babe in a way that reminded me of Ranger and I started toting up the matching points there are crazy grandparents, two hot guys both interested in Kitty and their names even start with a J and R respectively Jackson the hot werewolf cop who done her wrong in high school and the mysterious Raphael Kitty is kind of a disaster prone trouble magnetic But none of this is a bad thing as it has all the humor and entertainment value of an early Plum novel before they got repetitive and stale Kitty s family is hilarious, as are the situations she gets herself into and her interesting witchy ability to find things and resist the angelic persuasion that works on others Would be keen to readof Kitty s adventures but sadly there doesn t seem to be another book that I could find anyway


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